October 01, 2006
Moved!
So we finally left our drugged-out neighborhood in Hole-in-the-Wall, Springfield, and have moved our belongings to a much nicer less-drugged-out neighborhood in a different Hole-in-the-Wall, Springfield. This time, however, it's on the south side of town, so yay us! In the words of The Jeffersons' theme song, "We're moving on up...to the [South] side...We finally got a piece of the pie!"
The north side and south sides of town are to small-time Springfield, MO what the east and west sides are to New York. While there are nice places on each side, there's always that little bit of animosity toward the other [more "ghetto"] side.
I have nothing against the north side of town. We have lived on the north side both times we've lived in Springfield, but we knew it was time to leave the place we were in when we had to call the fire department twice within two months. A few months ago, we had the entire cast of Animal House move in underneath our apartment, and I'm pretty sure they were cooking up something stronger than cigarette smoke in there. The fumes were enough to make me fall asleep outside, so I'm pretty sure there was something going on. Plus, when strangers were knocking on my door at 2 AM asking "Where's Tony at??" (Like Dragnet, the stories are true, but the names are changed to protect the innocent - which I don't think is Tony, by the way!), I knew it was becoming my problem.
So, long story short, we got moved in on Friday. The following morning, I had to leave for Kansas City to pick up my brother Matt. By the time we got back, my wife had unpacked every box. The woman has a crazy work ethic when it comes to decorating.
I'll post more on this later, I'm sure.
Technorati Tags :: moving, rent, apartments
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August 07, 2006
I'm Officially a Tourist in My Hometown!
I never thought it would happen to me, but it did. I have officially become an American tourist...in the town I grew up in. Having technically lived almost a thousand miles away from my hometown of Panama City, Florida for roughly six years now (with the exception of 10 months in a small town nearby and an additional four months last summer), I returned with my family recently to "enjoy" a few days on the beach and in the sun.
The "fun in the sun" didn't exactly work out since we had to leave a few days early with the passing of my grandfather (Please keep my grandmother and my family in your prayers during this time.), although we were able to take a few of the nine days we spent in Florida and relax.
The problem is that my folks now live an hour away from where I grew up and the town they live in, while peaceful and tranquil in a Mayberry kind of way, is also extremely boring for anyone under the age of 55. Because of this, we have to drive at least an hour to go to one of our three choices of "exciting" towns which include Dothan, Alabama; Panama City, and Tallahassee.
Well, on this respective trip, we decided to go all out Panama City Beach. And as we did, something horrible began happening to me: I suddenly became Clark Griswold! I suddenly became the All-American tourist dad with all the seashells and tee-shirts and I stopped only short of the fanny-pack! I don't know how it happened! I don't know how I suddenly turned into my father on every family vacation we ever took until I was twelve. And yet, somehow, it happened.
I realized I had just done the unthinkable: I had become one of THOSE people. That's right! I had become a tourist!
Now, what's the problem with tourism? you might ask. Well, nothing in and of itself. When you happen to have grown up in a tourist city (as any native New Yorker or Hawaiian can tell you), through the years, you develop a certain growing disdain for tourists. You see, for the tourists, they have it great: they get to get away from work, get out of town, reconnect with the family, etc. But for the poor city dweller, the tourists are the reason the city dweller's roads are clogged, the reason all their favorite restaurants are packed with two-hour waits, and the reason that most city dwellers decide never to go anywhere remotely near the actual tourist destinations (in this case, the beach). I hope that makes sense.
(Oddly enough, I now find myself a "city dweller" again where the "tourists" are now the Griswalds coming to Branson!)
Perhaps now you can understand my predicament. I have now gone from being the "city dweller" in my hometown to being one of the people that I couldn't stand six years ago. I now became the reason Panama City's actual "city dwellers" couldn't access their roads, their restaurants, or their beaches. In other words, I was officially a Canadian. (No offense to my Canadian readers!)
I should also mention that my fourteen-month-old daughter hated the beach. And I mean she hated it! She was miserable the entire time we were there. She kept saying "No! No!" to the waves as they washed along the shore. So, not only was I an inconvenience to my hometown, but now, I'm an inconvenience to my own kid! Sheesh! How does a guy win with odds like that against him?
And now, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to watch National Lampoon's Vacation!
00:27 Posted in General, Travel | Permalink | Comments (0) | Email this | Tags: Beach, family, vacation, humor, trip, Blogosphere
August 02, 2006
Longest Flight of My Life
So, tonight (from 5:45 until 11:00 pm) was the longest traveling I think I've ever done. And I've traveled to Europe, South America, and virtually all across the United States. It was long for 3 reasons:
1. Delta Airlines and Atlanta, GA...suck! The two do not go well together. Delta can never EVER find a gate nearby and it takes about an hour to find a gate open.
2. Flying with a 14-month-old...sucks! She screams and cries when she cannot get down to walk all over the plane. And then everyone on the plane looks at you - the parent - and shakes their heads. Shut up, stupid kidless people!
3. Being delayed an hour-and-a-half because of thunderstorms (which the South has no shortage of this time of year)...sucks!
SO, all in all, it's great to be home! I'll have a much more positive tone once I get some sleep!
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July 15, 2006
I'm a Failed Event Planner
There are a lot of human beings that are gifted in some areas and not so gifted in others. Likewise, there are many human beings that are not particularly good at anything - most of the time these unfortunate people are aware of this. And then there are those who are good at many things (One might call these people "Jacks of all trades, masters of none.").
I'm typically pretty modest, but I'll admit, I'm pretty fortunate to be gifted in several areas. The problem is that most of my giftings tend to be in the same category (the arts - music, writing, performing, etc.), and the very things that most ordinary people are somewhat gifted in, I have absolutely none at all. For instance, I am a horrible - repeat, horrible! - publicist, but once someone else who is more gifted in that area (and believe me, it doesn't take much) actually gets the people there, I can entertain them (at least on some level).
One of the areas I have discovered I am increasingly bad in is the area of event planning. Although I have never been particularly good at organizing events, I find that this is one of the areas I become progressively worse in the more I try to do it. For one thing, I have virtually no common sense! Yes, my wife finds this extremely frustrating and I can't say I blame her. But it's true.
To give you an example, we've recently discovered that our fourteen-month-old daughter seems to inherit her mother's gift of common sense and street smarts. The other day, she had tried to get into our pantry (an everyday occurance), and when she could not reach the shelf she wanted, she walked away. I was amazed to discover moments later that she had returned with the dog bed, which she proceeded to turn upside down so that the solid end was facing "up." She then - knowing immediately what she had been planning - climbed up onto upside-down the dog bed and reached for the item on the shelf that she wanted. My wife smiled and said it sounded like something she would do. I looked bewildered and thought, "That's BRILLIANT! I NEVER would have thought of that!!"
(Now, keep in mind I can tell you every actor's name from "Stripes" but outside the performing arts category, there's not much else I can do.)
One lesson I have learned the hard way: when a laser tag venue tells you it shouldn't be necessary to reserve the venue on a Friday night, and you are preparing to bring in twenty teens to play laser tag, never take the worker's word for it. ALWAYS reserve it anyway, just in case. You Type-A's out there already know this - it comes natural for you - but believe me, the Type-B's of the world don't catch the drift so easily and we often suffer for it.
Also, when a particularly popular restaurant tells you that as long as you show up early, you should be fine (especially when they don't take reservations, but the food is very good), DON'T listen to them. Instead, run - not walk - as far away from the establishment as possible and reserve your table at Olive Garden! Again, Type-A's know this, Type-B's? Not so lucky.
So, in review, when you're looking to have dinner in a popular restaurant or enjoy a good game of laser tag, don't ask me to plan such an event (and please stay away from weddings, Christenings, and bar-mitzvahs around me). If, however, you would be interested in having rain, sleet, snow, or virtually any other kind of stormy condition at every outdoor event you would want to plan, give me a call. I'm thinking of making a regular business out of it.
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March 10, 2006
And Now, A Word From Grace
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VCFFFFF Cpijonbfk Fuhfuh Q398HP9IUHFIEUHU73R 08U[R0UOHILEG 9RFH 9HDFIUDIGFIDG IUHED IPFUHIDFHIDUH IFUH IPUFHE9F 9PUHFIJDH9F8YE9UHFIEJHRIU4WGF 7 97YR9HEIUFHIESUHFDHFKDH9P7Y4T EH9 8 8E 8EG9OI HP9TY9RUFHVCOIjk medk! JFBIEUBHDF!
Translation: "People must learn to respect each other. We must fight the wars, hatred, and injustices around us! It cannot go on. Also, when my mom and dad change my diaper and give me a bath, they are wasting my time. Seriously!"
16:05 Posted in Culture, Current Events, Fatherhood, General, Humor | Permalink | Comments (2) | Email this
February 15, 2006
Writer's Block
I love to write, but sometimes it seems like I put too much stock into one thing and then don't have the room for anything else in my brain. Anyone else feel like that? And today, I feel nothing in the creative cavities of the brain. Just the continuous wincing from all of the noise going on right next to my office (the church runs a daycare that's right next door - I love kids, but kids are loud!). Maybe I need some time out for a bit.
I also imagine that the "writer's block" I'm having comes from posting four-page documents in a blog! WHAT was I thinking? Hope you got something out of it.
15:20 Posted in General | Permalink | Comments (1) | Email this
February 08, 2006
Motivation
Is anyone else out there feeling a little unmotivated today?
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December 30, 2005
FUNNIEST HOUR ON TELEVISION...NO KIDDING
If you haven't tuned in yet, Thursday nights in January will be a great time to start. I will miss Joey on NBC Thursdays (old FRIENDS habits die hard), but these two newer ones will do great. Hopefully NBC gets their "Must-See" title back.
Maybe in January I can get my wife to watch with me.
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September 19, 2005
Back From the Long Trip
I got to see Colorado...for half a day.
Ah, it's good to be home.
About Midnight this morning, my brother Matt and I returned from our long trip back to Florida from Colorado Springs. Thirty-three hours. Pretty hard to do when you're functioning on less than three hours of sleep. Allow me to explain:
As I entered the house, Matt gave me the ol' tour. I saw all the rooms (three bachelors living in the same house) and everything. It was certainly spacious. And then, I saw the bed I was supposed to sleep in that night. Now, I am a pretty big germophobe and so that certainly accounts for a lot of my outlook on things, but this bed had wadded up sheets (used sheets) from what looked like months ago.
They hadn't even changed the sheets.
I asked, "How long have these sheets been on that bed?"
"Dude, I don't know," he said. Then, laughing, he added, "Probably a long time!"
That was it. I wasn't sleeping there. I'll just sleep on the couch, I guess.
No blankets or anything in the house. I was freezing all night. Finally, I got a T-Shirt out of my bag and covered my legs with it. Pretty sad.
Hard to believe people live that way.
But, nevertheless, it's good to be back. Sorry no pictures. I left my digital camera at home so my wife could take pictures of our daughter. That was more important. Colorado Springs was beautiful, though. I loved the atmosphere there.
Maybe I'll take some photos of Florida and post those. For those of you who don't live in Florida.
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